A Thought To Consider

Dan and I have been reading through a book that my mom got us a while ago. It is a couples devotional, and only takes a few minutes at the end of the day. It gives us a few questions to talk about every night too. The book is called Night Light and is written by the Dobsons. It has been so good for our relationship.

The part of the book that we are going through right now is focused on parenting. It seems like you can get parenting advise from just about anyone today. Some advise is extremely helpful coming from people that genuinely want to help, other advise may be rude and isn't helpful at all. One thing I have learned as a parent is that you are going to get advice whether you want it or not.

I am not one that minds the overflow of advise much. Usually, I try to take what will work for us and leave the rest. As long as it is presented to me compassionately, I am pretty much always willing to listen to parents who have been there and done that. What works for one family may not work at all for another family. I also believe that most of the time all a parent wants, is to do what is best for their child. We love them and we do our best.

Back to the book, though. I wanted to share a quote that I found encouraging. It said, "The story of your home is etching itself into the spirit and memory of your child". After my super productive day yesterday, I am exhausted today (I should have known this was coming). Lack of motivation has given me a lot of time to think about that quote. I can say for my own childhood it is so very true.

You never know what your child's first memory will be. Some people would guess that it would be a big trip, or some other significant event. I know that many of my first memories weren't anything like that. So I sat down to think about what some of them were. I won't share all of them but I will share a few that I thought of real quick.

• Playing in the sandbox with my friends.
• All four of us cuddled in my mom's bed while she read us books.
• Sitting with my grandfather as he shared a grapefruit with me. 
• "Midnight walks" through town with my mom and siblings. (really took place at about 8:30)
• Bear hugs from my pastor at the church we attended.

Dan has a whole set of great memories from his childhood too. We can probably both think of some sad or scary memories, but it certainly isn't the first thing we think of. I am not about to give parenting advice, nor would I be qualified to do so. I did think however, that the quote was worth a thought. If nothing else, it will be helpful to me when I look back at it in a year or two. 

It has challenged me to spend more of the time I have with Logan really being involved in his life, even at his young age. It has challenged me to spend a little less time on the computer today, and a little more time reading to him. It has challenged me to allow him to help with some of the chores instead of trying to distract him with something else, while I rush through them. It has challenged me to get right down at eye level and really try to listen and understand him when he is getting frustrated about something. 

I am not saying that kids should be spoiled for fear of their first memory being a bad one. I am simply saying that for all of the things that my mom went through as a single mother of four, I have some pretty amazing memories. For all of the times that we needed to be disciplined and corrected, I remember feeling loved. I felt loved because she spent time with us... loving us. I hope that Logan will have sweet memories as he gets older. I hope that he will feel secure and safe in his relationship with us. 

Keep on doing your best! Your babies will thank you one day.